The Loss of A Friend

On Thursday morning, a childhood friend of ours was murdered in Garland.
Today my Mom, Patrick and I attended his funeral (also the funeral of his best friend, who was also murdered that same morning along with Steven)
I sat there today in the big beautiful Church, grieving the loss of this person. I hadn't seen him for years, but he was a big part of my childhood. As a matter of fact, he had a huge crush on me when we were little :) We would often go to Steven's house, to play with him and his sister and brother. I remember seeing the things he had "created" with legos and whatnot. I remember playing in their backyard....making baskets together....eating peanut butter balls....

There was a slideshow of photos shown. One photo in particular really brought the tears to my eyes. It was from the years that we had known each other well. A little skinny boy, with scrunched up happy eyes, and a mop of wavy hair. To me, that was him.
But that was only him as I had last known him. He had gone on and grown up, as have I, and he was a unique individual, who I really no longer knew.
Yet I had known him, and now he is no longer living on this earth. The same age as me...and now, gone. How strange, and how very sad.

His funeral was so beautiful. I loved the songs, and I was so encouraged by what the pastor there said. So much Godly encouragement came from such deep deep sorrow.
It would have been so easy for that service to have been otherwise.
Two lives just taken away, in one short moment.
Such circumstances open the doors to all things - including bitterness and hate - yet I did not hear hate and bitterness expressed towards the teens who committed this horrible, horrible sin called murder.
Instead, beautiful things were remembered of those who we loved, and the pastor enouraged us all with the truths from God's word.
Truth like, there are no accidents. Everything that happens, God already knew about. It was no surprise to Him. Although we cannot always know why He would allow such things to happen, there is a reason. This separation is not forever. Someday our dear friends will be re-united with their loved ones....and that Steve and Matthew are in Heaven. Their bodies were but shells. The real Steven and the real Matthew are with the Lord. We do not grieve for them, but for ourselves....

yet, tonight I am home. I still have my husband, my brother, my parents, my son.
I find myself thinking about the family who does not have their husband, their daddy. The family who no longer has their son and their brother. My darkest imaginations, I'm sure, cannot even begin to compare one degree to the horrible pain, sadness and deep, deep loss they must feel. I hope that God pours out His grace upon them, and holds them in His arms. I hope they feel Him near each and every moment.

Our thoughts and prayers are with you. We love you.